Intro: C
C G Am Em
I like glitter and sparkly dresses.
F
But I’m not gonna talk about that
G
in my monologue.
C G Am Em
I like baking and things that smell like winter.
F
But I’m not gonna talk about that
G
in my monologue.
C
La la la. La la la.
C G Am Em
I like writing songs about douchebags who cheat on me.
F
But I’m not gonna say that
G
in my monologue.
C G Am Em
I like writing their names into songs so they’re ashamed
to Go in public.
F
But I’m not gonna say that
G
in my monologue.
C
C G Am G F G
La la. La la la la la. This is my musical monologue.
C G Am Em
You might think I’d bring up Joe, that guy who broke up
with me on the phone.
F
But I’m not gonna mention him,
G
in my monologue.
C
Hey Joe, I’m doing real well!
G Am Em
Tonight I’m hosting ‘SNL.’
F
But I’m gonna brag about that
G
in my monologue.
C
La la la. Ha ha ha.
Ha ha ha. Ha ha ha. La la la.
C G Am Em
And if you’re wondering if I might be dating the werewolf
from ‘Twilight.’
F
I’m not gonna comment on that
G
in my monologue.
C G Am G F G
La la. La la la la la. This is my musical monologue.
Am
Am Em
You might be expecting me to say something bad about Kanye
F
and how he ran up on the stage and ruined my VMA monologue.
C G Am G F
But there’s nothing more to say cuz everything’s OK.
F
I’ve got security lining the stage.
It’s my ‘SNL’ monologue.
C G Am G F G
La la. La la la la la. This is my ‘SNL’ monologue.
C G Am G F G
La la. La la la la la. That was my ‘SNL’ monologue.
