Once I read a book
G
And this is what it said
A
If your music has a beat
E
Then you’re gonna wind up dead
E G
It doesn’t really matter if it’s Christian or not
A E
If it’s syncopated rhythm then your soul is gonna rot
E G
And this book was called “Ha! Your Gonna Burn”
A E
And in the second chapter I went on to learn
Chorus:
E G
Take two houseplants
A E
And put them to the test
E G
Set them both in front of speakers
A E
And let the music do the rest
E G
The first one you play Mozart
A E
Or something lovely like that
E G A
The second one you play that Petra Or that MegaDeth.
E
Doesn’t really matter what kind of rock it is.
E
So I took my two houseplants
G
And I put them to the test
A
Set them both in front of speakers
E
To let the music do the rest
E
I powered up my Pioneers
G
To let the music roar
A
But twenty minutes later
E
Someone’s knocking at my door
E
I opened up my door
G
And there my neighbor stood
A
He said, “Man I’d like to get some sleep
E
If you think I could”
E
I said, “Man, can’t you see here
G
I’ve got this moral dilemma
A
that I got to get clear.”
E
He said, ” What kind of moral dilemma
E
Could you have at this time of night
G
That could make me so angry
A
That I just want to fight!?”
E
So I pointed to the page in that open book
E G
That had a picture of a potted plant
A E
And I said, “Go have a look.” And he read
Chorus:
E G
Take two houseplants
A E
And put them to the test
E G
Set them both in front of speakers
A E
And let the music do the rest
E G
The first one you play Mozart
A E
Or something lovely like that
E G A
The second one you play that Petra Or that MegaDeth.
E
Doesn’t really matter what kind of rock it is.
E
First of all he said,
G
“That’s Wagner that you’re playing
A
I’ve never heard of Petra
E
And isn’t MegaDeth all dead.”
E
And secondly, emphatically, He asked me,
G
“What’s the sense
A
of hanging out with houseplants when, hey,
E
I live right across the fence.”
E
And I thought to myself
G
You know, that’s a good point
A
So I took my two houseplants, and
E
I put them both back outside
E
And me and my neighbor
G
Well, we went out for a drive
A
We talked about all the things
E
That really matter most
E
Like life and love and happiness
G
And then the Holy Ghost
A
And now my two houseplants
E
They sit out in the sun
E
As for me and my neighbor
G
Well our friendship has become
A
A meaningful relationship
E
That’s headed straight to heaven
E
But as for now
G
We like to sit around
A
and listen to Audio Adrenaline
E
Cranked to eleven!
Chorus:
E G
Take two houseplants
A E
And put them to the test
E G
Set them both in front of speakers
A E
And let the music do the rest
E G
The first one you play Mozart
A E
Or something lovely like that
E G A
The second one you play that Petra Or that MegaDeth.
E
Doesn’t really matter what kind of rock it is.
